Letter of Rage

Dear makers of women’s clothing,

I know this probably comes as quite a shock to you, but I don’t actually WANT pants that are “perfectly slimming.” I also don’t want skirts with “tummy control,” “hip minimizer” swimsuits, or “control top” tights or leggings.

I don’t want anything that involves the word “shaper” or “waist nipper” or a “torsette,” which I’m not even sure is, but it doesn’t look nearly as awesome as a corset and sounds like it stands for TORTURE. I don’t want anything that claims to be able to mold my perfectly fine body into a brand new slim shape that reveals the new me.

Because the old me is perfectly fine. I like my shape. It doesn’t need to be squeezed, squashed, or shoved into some sort of compression garment designed to make my body look the way YOU find attractive.

I’m pretty damn attractive as is.

And it’s all of you. Clothes that are made for petite women involve “shapers” and “minimizers” and “tummy control.” Clothes made specifically for big girls seem to think that all we do is worry about how best to squeeze ourselves into different contortions in order to make our clothes look better.

How about you make better fucking clothes? Make clothes that show off the shape I have?

Because you know what I do want? I want jeans that flatter my ass, not shape it. I want tops that keep the girls tucked in at work but still show off my awesome waist, and I want a fucking pair of brown leggings that actually fit in the crotch but don’t leave compression marks on my stomach.

Look at what you’re making. Look how you’re marketing to women. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH HAVING CURVES. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH HAVING A BELLY OR AN ASS OR, GODS FORBID, TO ACTUALLY LIKE YOUR BODY.

There is nothing wrong with me.

There is a shit ton wrong with the clothing you sell.