Pants Optional

My child has decided, after a discussion with his father, who was trying to get him to stop crying and crying and crying for no apparent reason, that this year, we shall celebrate Hanukkah. This seems like a downright swell idea to me, so we’re going with it. The fact that we aren’t Jewish doesn’t matter all that much, does it?

We’ll grab a Menorah, light some candles, and have 8 days of presents. I like that better anyway.

It might help me deal with the sheer utter stupid that I ran into today. So, I pass my boss in the hall twice today, smile as she passes, I think one time I even said ‘Hi,’ once. She doesnt so much as glance my way. Seriously, not a flicker. Not a nod. Nothing.

Um. I figured maybe she was just…distracted. So i go about my day, get my kids on the bus with no major drama…and when I get home, Brandus says, “Um..”

“Yes?”

“My principal pulled me aside today, and said I should have a talk with you.”

“….Uh…..why?”

“She wants to know what you did to get on your principal’s bad side, and that you better kiss ass FAST to get on her good side.”

Let me rephrase this whole conversation. Brandus was pulled aside, BY HIS PRINCIPAL, to warn me I needed to get on MY PRINCIPAL’S good side.

She’s talking shit about me, people. TO OTHER PRINCIPALS. And let us review – what exactly have i done so wrong?

1. I didnt check in when I went on a home visit that lasted longer than usual, leading me to be, in her eyes, an hour late returning to the school. And leaving my room a mess…even though they hadn’t delivered my furniture until we had already left for the home visit, and we didn’t KNOW the room was a mess.

2. My lesson plans printed off strangely, cutting off a sliver of the letters down one side.

THESE ARE THE ONLY THINGS I KNOW I’VE DONE WRONG. Every single freaking thing she has told me to do, we have done. And we have hopped to every single time she has said hop.

I can’t even hate her. She’s too fucking ridiculous.